If you Google attracting women…
It's full of:
- what to wear…
- muscles to build…
- pick up lines to use…
While physical attraction is important for first impressions…
a HUGE key component is missing.
So what does it take?
Attracting women is a little more complex…
You have to stimulate their mind.
Make them FEEL a certain way.
Combine a strong first impression physically & emotionally…
and you might have a chance to win her over.
FYI – all of this will backfire if you're approaching them for the sole purpose of seduction.
The motive behind your behavior is just as important as the actual behavior.
The most attractive way to make them feel something is with confidence, authenticity, and integrity.
This article is going to cover some subtle signals that will help you (physically and emotionally) become more attractive.
Attractive Man Trait 1. Wear Red
Red is a powerful color. It's been used as a status symbol for men since Roman times. It's also more sexually appealing than other colors.
In fact, this is a cross-cultural kind of thing. A study was made in 2010 involving women from different countries – Germany, England, China and the US. They were asked to rate the attractiveness of different men's faces that were photographed in black and white.
Two variables were digitally altered per picture: (1) the color of the background and (2) the color of the t-shirt.
The ladies found a guy more attractive whenever there was a red background/shirt than whenever there was neither.
So believe it or not, red does increase your marketability. Wear it the right way (just one piece – even just a pocket square) and you can amp up your style and your game.
Attractive Man Trait 2. Look More Mature
If you're worried about looking older – here’s a reality check. Psychologists have studied about young adult women who are financially independent and as it turns out… old is gold.
Those ladies fall prey to what’s known as the “George Clooney Effect.” Fhionna Moore of the University of Dundee explains this further, saying self-sufficient women are drawn to maturity. Remember our biology – women have menopause while men are fertile for much longer.
They like a man who looks “experienced” with life. They think he’ll make a good provider – but it’s not that they're being needy. They see him as someone who’s not going to fool around. A guy who's wise and ready for commitment.
If you learn the ways of an older gentleman, you’ll realize that “old” here doesn’t mean dull or boring – but classy.
Attractive Man Trait 3. Don't Buy Generics Or Counterfeits
When you buy a counterfeit it sends the message that you settle for second best.
It also shows that you care more about people's opinion of you than your perception of yourself.
Think about it. If you're wearing a fake Gucci suit and it's noticeable – it sends the message that you care more about people thinking you own the real thing. You're worried more about your status than about being your true authentic self.
At the end of the day, it comes down to one thing: Confidence in yourself. A man who is authentic won't try and portray someone he isn't. He'll buy what he can afford, and own it.
If he isn't where he wants to be in life he'll own that too. At the end of the day, he'll be more attractive because he isn't fake.
Attractive Man Trait 4. Dress Like A Dandy
The art of dandyism dates back to the 18th century. Famous men like George Bryan “Beau” Brummell were known to live and breathe it – taking as much as 5 hours a day just to dress perfectly!
You won’t spend that much time on your style… but you’ll want to apply the principles. These days it’s less about over-the-top dressing and more about expressing yourself.
A modern dandy’s clothes are tailored amazingly well. He minimizes ornaments. The color, texture and all the small details are carefully picked out. He's quite artistic – and that’s why he outshines other well-dressed men.
Who are the dandy guys of today? You’ll find many on Instagram and some of them going viral on newsfeeds. Take inspiration from them – there’s a reason they have loads of followers.
Attractive Man Trait 5. Own Your Oddness
As handsome as you are, you should also embrace your odd features. Our society considers them “imperfections” but really… who doesn’t have them? What IS perfect in this world?
So learn to see what's odd about you and harness it in a way that works. Maybe your hair is a little weird – why not grow it out and explore a different style? Or if you need eyeglasses – why not try fun glasses? Or if you’re naturally thin – how about skinny clothes?
Whatever your imperfection is – gap between teeth, big eyebrows etc. – own it. People are used to seeing things so close to perfect that nothing seems genuine anymore. Odd makes you look more human. That’s your appeal.
Attractive Man Trait 6. Eat “Tanning” Food
If you’re the type who likes to spray tan or spend hours under the sun… here’s a better alternative. Switch up your diet to food that's rich in carotenoids. You know what they say – you are what you eat.
Carotenoids are compounds which give your skin a natural glowing tan through regular intake. Some great sources include:
- Butternut Squash
- Cantaloupe Melon
- Dark Leafy Greens
- Dried Apricots
- Sweet Potato
- Sweet Red Peppers
A study that came out in The Quarterly Journal of Experimental Psychology showed that 86% of people found a carotenoid tan more attractive than a pale face.
It also compared faces that had both carotenoid tan and sun tan versions – and more preferred the carotenoid type. So high-carotenoid foods aren't just good for your health. They’re great for your skin.
Attractive Man Trait 7. Forearms and Vascularity
This one might surprise you.
One thing that signals leanness is a pair of toned arms that show off some veins. Those lines indicate less fat and more muscle. If yours are visible – you’re physically on the right track.
Most guys at the gym want to get buff – but it’s not what gets the ladies. The real determining factor is leanness.
Being lean is about a low percentage of body fat – ideally at 12%. It’s most attractive to women according to a study in the Proceedings of the Royal Society of Biological Sciences.
The women in the study rated young men of all body sizes and the results were clear. Low body fat – not masculine features – was linked to high levels of attractiveness, testosterone, and strong immune systems. Lean was more impressive than bulky.
Attractive Man Trait 8. Sleep Well
Your goal is to get eight hours of shut-eye a day. How can your body recharge and repair itself if you stay awake? And don’t think lack of sleep is just a brain issue – it’s also unattractive.
A study was performed at the Karolinska Institutet in Sweden where people judged human faces based on two different photos. The subject was either sleep-deprived or well-rested (but the observers didn’t know this).
The findings were consistent – sleep-deprived faces appeared less attractive AND less healthy. Red eyes were also seen as major turn-offs. So you better rest up. There’s a reason we call it beauty sleep.
Attractive Man Trait 9. Be Mindful
Outside of the physical components – attracting women comes down to sparking an emotional response.
For men – it's simple. If we're attracted to a woman, we pursue a physical relationship. If we feel respected we pursue an emotional relationship.
For women – attraction more than just physical. Their mind needs to be attracted to your mind (AKA you have to win them over emotionally).
A study was made in Australia on factors that predict initial romantic attraction. University students participated in a speed-dating session where ultimately, the women were more attracted to men with a greater mindful disposition. Looks weren’t as big of a factor.
So what exactly does this mean? It’s all about your ability to pay attention, be insightful and engage with women well. It’s how you take the wheel and steer the conversation so that it never gets boring or awkward. That's how the ladies will enjoy your company.
Attractive Man Trait 10. Make Fun Of Yourself
Making women laugh is an important thing. But did you know that self-deprecating humor actually works? Evidently yes – that's the appeal of Hugh Grant.
Researchers discuss this kind of humor in the article “Dissing Oneself: The Sexual Attractiveness of Self-Deprecating Humor.” They say it makes a man more desirable – as it exposes his flaws and spins them in a positive way. Remember how we should own our imperfections? That’s the correlation.
Having a good sense of humor about yourself is how you make women see you differently. They’ll laugh, feel more comfortable and less pressured to look or act a certain way.
And when they realize that – eureka! You’re the guy who can make a relationship fun and less “prim and proper.” You’re somebody they can be themselves around. That makes you a great catch.
Attractive Man Trait 11. The Little Things
I thought wearing a baseball cap backward was sloppy and best left to frat bros. It seems I might be in the minority though. While I was doing my research, I saw women say they really like a man who does this. Maybe women like the relaxed, devil-may-care look a backward baseball cap can give you.
How about rolling up your sleeves? You might think this is practical when you're doing dirty work or chores but this is apparently a very popular look women love to see on their man.
It's not hard to see why women mentioned this. You're showing some skin, they can see the veins in your arms while you do your thing, it's a good look.
“BACKWARDS BALL CAPS! Any time a man slides that bill to the back, he instantly gets hotter!” – jedicajohnsonjblove
Attractive Man Trait 12. Putting On A Tie…Then Undoing It
However you look at it, women seem to love seeing a man wearing a tie. The humble necktie can instantly pull together a smart-casual outfit and make a suit look sexier.
Going black tie? Wearing a bowtie undone might seem like a cliché to you and me, but it still seems to work wonders on women. You still look smart but it makes you more approachable and relaxed, you're in your element.
“An untied bow tie. That floors me.” – ElineK
Attractive Man Trait 13. Wearing Boots
After doing this research, I recommend each one of you pick up a pair of boots. GQ asked 200 women what the most attractive shoes men could wear for a first date would be and 77% said boots.
This makes sense to me. You're associating yourself with the tough-as-nails workers and cowboys of legend who created the modern world over the last two centuries. You might not be a tough man hard at work every day but it couldn't hurt to look like you're ready to fell a tree at a moment's notice.
Attractive Man Trait 14. Leveraging The Power Of Accessories
Gentlemen, if you're not wearing a belt and watch you need to get on it because women will notice. They instantly improve any outfit. Get into the habit of putting a belt and watch on first thing in the morning as part of your daily routine. Before you know it, you won't even realize you're doing it.
If you wear contact lenses, try a pair of glasses. The women have spoken and I'm 100% with them because the science backs it up. The human eye loves symmetry, and that's what glasses give you. They make you objectively better-looking.
“Ooh, when a man wears glasses. Yas mama!” – sarahas1516
Simply put, ladies love a well-put-together man.
Attractive Man Trait 15. Controlling Your Car
Another quality you might need to be a woman to fully understand! Driving your car with one hand or just two fingers on the steering wheel was mentioned as something women love to see their men do. Also, driving with one elbow resting on your open window. Handling a car with ease gives you a relaxed presence women want to be around.
Lastly, parallel parking will impress your guy friends but is also a great trick you should be showing off to the women in your life.
Ultimately, what these come down to is showing you are in control of the vehicle. Whoever is with you in the car can feel safe.
“When my husband smoothly pulls our truck into a tight spot…Oooooooooooh.”
Attractive Man Trait 16. Proving You're Thinking Of Her
Here's another thing you can do without even leaving the car: reverse with your hand on her headrest. You're reminding the woman you have in the passenger seat she is on your mind.
Even small gestures like putting your hand on the small of your wife's back or giving her the ‘soft eyes' across a table in a restaurant will mean the world. It just lets her know you're thinking of her.
As one woman put it, “I'll catch my boyfriend looking at me with that softer look, and I'll say, teasingly, ‘You're staring!' and he'll say, ‘Gazing!' and look away.”
Attractive Man Trait 17. Showing Off Your Brainpower
Next up, women love a guy who's smart but without coming off as arrogant.
How do you show you're intelligent without bragging about it? It doesn't have to be complicated, even holding or reading a book in public increases your attractiveness.
Did you know there's an entire Instagram account dedicated to good-looking guys reading books on the subway? Just saying…
Attractive Man Trait 18. Caring For Yourself And Others
“I LOVE watching my boyfriend cook,” one woman wrote in a Reddit thread. Women love it when a guy shows he can sustain himself and others. A home-cooked meal made from scratch, served in an organized and clean house, is indisputable evidence. After all, how many women want to date a man who's actually looking for a free cook/cleaner?
Of course, the guys who get guaranteed full credit are the men who are good with kids. It should be no surprise a woman's maternal instincts makes her more interested in someone who can take care of children, even if the relationship is just beginning.
Attractive Man Trait 19. Wearing A Well-Fitted Shirt
Think about it, guys love when a woman wears a form-fitting dress. This is the equivalent for men.
If you have an athletic, V-shaped build, a tight t-shirt is perfect. Black or white is best, women say. Those of you who are larger or with a pear-shaped body, opt for a casual button-down shirt. Go here for a complete guide to men's body shapes and what fits best.
“A good muscular packed chest that looks amazing under a shirt.” – luvcrgirl
Attractive Man Trait 20. Running Your Fingers Through Your Hair
In one thread I saw, a user wrote about when men “run their fingers through their hair. Especially when they're doing it subconsciously, like while thinking”.
I think this shows the value in seeing what women themselves really think. Sometimes it really can be the things you or I wouldn't think twice about that drive a woman crazy. You probably do this at least once a day without even realizing it.
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This research was really interesting for me. Some of these only take a second to actually do but it's the thought and attention to detail that count, which clearly comes out in the findings here.
Looking relaxed and approachable while still being strong and in control seems to be what unites all of these. That said, some of these (I'm looking at you, backward baseball cap!) were really unexpected and I had a lot of fun putting together this list and video.
Attractive Man Trait 21. Stay In Touch
In today’s fast-paced society, showing someone you're thinking of them with a Facebook message or text is a great way to increase your attractiveness. Relationship coaching expert Corey Lane writes that texting helps facilitate and underscore the mystery of romance for women.
Follow these simple guidelines and you will have a great chance of increasing your attractiveness with texting:
- Keep it short – long messages can be overwhelming.
- Think before you message – letters on a screen can be misinterpreted without body language, tone of voice etc so take your time and be clear, use correct spelling.
- Use emojis – there are a great way to show your emotions and add some fun to what is otherwise plain letters on a screen.
- Timing is important – find a balance between seeming anxious and coming across as a jerk who is not finding time for someone who should feel important.
Attractive Man Trait 21. Shave Your Head
Do you have a bald spot or thinning hair? This is for you. A 2012 study in ‘Social Psychological and Personality Science' had people rate photos of men with hair and with digitally shaved heads.
Participants rated the bald men as being more dominant, confident, masculine, taller, you name it. In fact, this effect still showed up when the experimenters used no photos, just verbal descriptions.
Attractive Man Trait Bonus: Smell Nice
Maybe fragrance isn’t a big deal to you. In fact, a lot of men don’t bother wearing it. But remember that smell is our strongest sense. It connects to our memory which triggers some sort of emotion – whether it's good or bad.
Try taking some time to learn about fragrance and the different types available. Understand the basics and soon enough, you’ll find a product that gives you the perfect scent. It’ll help you become the most attractive guy around.