When you think of being a nice guy what do you think of?
Probably your mother telling you you’re a nice guy, right?
Do you know what I think about? My biggest crush in high school telling me: “You’re such a nice guy, but you’re not my type.”
We’ve all been there or at least in a similar situation.
What do we do? How do we stop being the “nice guy?”
Today, you're going to learn the 4 ways you can go from being a “nice” guy to being a REAL man.
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How To Be a Real Man – Contents
What is a REAL Man?
You might be wondering what I mean by a “REAL” man. R.E.A.L. is an acronym, and it stands for – Responsible, Eclectic, Authentic, and Loving.
This is what it means to be a REAL man. I strive for this each day.
And so should you.
Let’s break each of those down…
How To Be a Real Man Step 1. – Be Responsible
Everyone tells you to be responsible, but what does that mean? 100% ownership over everything in your life.
Everything you do, everything you say – you have to be accountable for your actions.
This includes the good and the bad. You can’t be afraid of owning up to a mistake.
For example, if when you buy a car outright, you have complete control over this car. You can change the color of it, a new radio, adjust your seat. You can do anything you want.
By having this in your life, you can change anything about your life you don’t like. You will own your life.
The responsible man incorporates the following 5 traits into being responsible.
Honesty is the best policy. You might be able to get away with a lie for a while but they will catch up with you at some point. Part of how to be a real man is telling the truth no matter what. Don't take the easy way out. Tell the truth.
Compassion is a trait that many lack and I did for a long time. You need to look at people for who they are and understand that we all grew up with prejudices. Recognize your biases and divorce yourself from them. Be slow to judge – everyone comes from different walks of life. They all deserve kindness and respect from you.
Fairness is needed to combat our prejudices. As humans, we love to classify things and put them into a box. Don't do this with people. By being unfair, you limit your outlook and probably miss many opportunities just because you think someone is something they aren't.
You have to be accountable for your actions both good and bad. What do I mean by this: you acknowledge and accept the consequences of your actions. It is so easy to blame others for your problems or to do the wrong thing, the responsible man does the right thing and if he doesn't he acknowledges that and apologizes and strives to be better.
The responsible man dares to do the right thing. It is so easy to get caught up in the “group think” mentality. Before you know it, you're just going with the flow, and not realizing what you're doing is wrong. Stand up for what is right and break the mold. Go against the grain and have the courage to do the right thing.
How To Be a Real Man Step 2. – Be Eclectic
The dictionary definition of eclectic is “deriving ideas, style, or taste from a broad and diverse range of sources.” Don’t be boring.
It is very easy to become laser-focused on your career and only studying and reading about that. While that is important to a certain degree, it is even more important to branch out and learn more about everything.
First of all, this will prevent burnout in your career. If you eat, sleep, live and breathe your job for too long, you will burn out. It is only a matter of time. Find a hobby or interest outside of work.
Secondly, being eclectic make you a much better conversationalist as well as just being more attractive. You won’t be as one dimensional, and you’ll be able to relate to others much more. This will also make people want to talk to you.
Get outside of your comfort zone and experiment. You will get to know yourself better and become a more rounded person.
How To Be a Real Man Step 3. – Be Authentic
Being authentic is a cornerstone of being a REAL man. If you’re not authentic, everyone will notice and won’t trust you. Be genuine and truthful.
This means telling the truth even when it’s more comfortable to lie. This means being transparent and not misleading people for your gain. Men who mislead people may get ahead very quickly, but it will catch up with them and will cause them to lose everything.
Don’t take the shortcut! If you’re ever in charge of a group of your peers, this is even more important. If you are authentic in communicating and expressing your ideas, people will trust you because they don’t have anything to fear with you.
People will often say, be yourself. I challenge you to be your best self. Speak from the heart and genuinely want the best for others.
How To Be a Real Man Step 4. – Be Loving
Yes, the number 1 scariest word to men – love.
Now, I have to admit this might be the most challenging part to embrace. In today’s world, it isn’t easy to love others.
What do I mean when I say love others? I don’t mean romantic love with everyone. I suggest showing them unconditional love and appreciation.
Most of us men are brought up with the idea that love is a weakness. The “strong silent type” has become a standard among men. You think that if you don’t let people in then, they can’t hurt you. Let me tell you, they still can.
“Let me tell you something you already know. The world ain't all sunshine and rainbows. It's a very mean and nasty place and I don't care how tough you are it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain't about how hard ya hit. It's about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward. How much you can take and keep moving forward. That's how winning is done!” – Rocky Balboa
So many people in our world today want to love. They crave it. As humans, we all crave it to a certain extent, and you need to have the strength to give that love.
This can be with your guy friends too. There has nothing to do with your sexuality. This has to do with you caring and appreciating a guy who has always had your back.
It doesn’t make you weak if you love; it makes you stronger than most. While most are too afraid to love, you are going out into life knowing that you might get hurt but that the love you take is equal to the love you make.
How To Be a Real Man – Summary
There you have it gentleman.
Now that you know what you have to do, why not start reading more about men's style to become eclectic?
Click here to check out the top 10 jackets you need in fall this year or check out more related articles below!