If you think that your ability to produce will compensate for a poor appearance, think again.
Vanity, however, must be avoided if a good looking man is also a good man.
This article discusses appearances as important at a job interview and then focuses on the importance of not being self-absorbed.
Looks Do Matter: A Gentleman's Appearances
“You never get a second chance to make a first impression.” Tired of hearing that old adage? If you are, it's because you've heard it so much. Do you know why you've heard it so much? Because it's true.
First impressions are the most important exchange in any relationship. Whether looking for friends, significant others, employers or employees, a person's first summary of you will stick with them whether you end up changing their mind about you or not.
Phrases like the old one here have been replaced today with the likes of, “Looks don't matter, only results.” What does that phrase really mean? It means that only product is important, not process. Any entrepreneur will defy that phase and tell you that people are more important than dollars even on the worst day.
What does this have to do with a gentleman's looks? A gentleman's appearance sets the stage for a relationship, a connection, and these connections are what will make or break his career and personal relationships. A man must take his looks seriously if he wants to make meaningful connections and therefore fruitful relationships in all areas of his life.
A Gentleman's Appearances For Potential Employers & Interviews
No doubt, Robert Pattinson is a good-looking guy. His look reflects a trend seen a lot today in Hollywood men, the bed head and two-day beard; combine that with keen blue eyes and a smile that melts the ladies, and you have a look that stands out on the red carpet. But what if he slipped on a custom suit and
But what if he slipped on a custom suit and tie and showed up for a job interview with his head looking like this? Does it project a fashion forward and cool guy image? Let's see:
Yes, it's a hip look. But is that what you want an employer to think when they first look at you? It shouldn't be. A potential employer should see a clean shaven face or one with kempt facial hair, not stubble. This shouldn't stop once you've got the job, either. Your hair should be styled conservatively — no bed head.
A potential employer should see a clean shaven face or one with kempt facial hair, not stubble. This shouldn't stop once you've got the job, either. Your hair should be styled conservatively — no bed head.
Forget what the guys in Maxim look like for a while and wear a hairstyle that doesn't resemble a wet mop. A simple side-parted hairstyle is timeless and won't ever go out of style, and despite its simplicity, can be quite expressive for any individual.
A man who is familiar with classic men's style won't have a problem choosing clothes for an interview, but a less knowledgeable man might have a hard time.
No need to fear, though. Just like the classic hair cut mentioned above, there is a look which will never go out and will always show taste and style: navy suit, white shirt, and burgundy tie. That is always a profitable combination.
Accessories such as a pocket square and proper jewelry will really show class, intelligence, and sophistication. These characteristics will show through to a potential employer before you say a word because of how you look.
What employer out there is looking for a trashy, stupid, and crude man to fill their position? Not one; therefore, look the part for the job, and you'll go far without even speaking in promoting yourself as the right man for the job.
How A Gentleman Balances Care Against Vanity
Men want to be men. An hour in the bathroom is what women do in the morning, but not men. There are bathroom products being pushed on men today that act as shampoo, body wash, and shave cream in order to simplify a man's bathroom experience and get him out of there as quickly as he can, so he can go out and take on the world, make a million, etc.
Men look down on men who get their eyebrows waxed, wear makeup, spend thousands on fine jewelry and even get plastic surgery done on their faces.
Which is right? The man who gets in and out of the bathroom in fifteen minutes flat in the morning or the man who primps for two hours before having coffee?
One of Al Pacino's most memorable movie lines comes from The Devil's Advocate: “Vanity is definitely my favorite sin.” Temporally speaking, vanity is a favorite transgression of many men today.
Being vain about one's looks doesn't mean simply wanting to look good. The definition of vain as pertains to a man's appearance is the willing imposition of oneself upon another for personal gratification, either by praise (“you look good Tim”) or by superiority (“I'm better than you because I look this way”).
Vanity is a perverse state of mind, it feeds on every little bit of attention it is given, and it is a vice that must not be indulged. When a man first starts making positive changes in his appearance, it is easy to get puffed up about how great he is because of how he looks.
This isn't so – if he looks great it's because he looks great, not because he is great. Looking good is important, but do not let vanity rule you.
On the other hand, looking like a frat boy has been out since you ceased to be a frat boy. The time and place for looking like you rolled out of bed two minutes before class is in the past and it's time to start dressing and maintaining yourself like a man.
If shaving, men shave daily. If sporting facial hair, men maintain it – daily. Men get haircuts no less than every six to eight weeks, depending on the man.
Men wash and iron their clothes, or otherwise see to it that they're washed and ironed (perhaps the Mrs. tends the clothes while he keeps the bathroom clean and the bed made, or the like).
Men don't use three-in-one shampoo/bodywash/shave cream no matter which big razor manufacturer tells them to, nor do they use cheap body spray in place of a good cologne. Men brush their teeth twice a day. Men bathe regularly.
Men purchase quality clothes and shoes even if that means spending more money and getting the new video game next paycheck. The best website out there dedicated to old-fashioned manliness is The Art of Manliness, so look there to see what else it means to look like and be a man.
Time to grow up, guys
The Gentleman's Standard
What we are ultimately talking about is becoming a gentleman. Too many men didn't have a strong male figure in their life when growing up to whom they looked for a good, manly foundation.
Many men are trying to be too much like women or think manliness consists of vain delights and putting people down.
Irrespective of what kind of man you are, good, bad, or indifferent, find a man you can look up to. It doesn't even have to be a real person. It can be your dad or granddad, or it can be Dirk Pitt or Luke Skywalker.
Pick a man that embodies the manly virtues which you are striving to train in yourself and try to be like him. Find a man that cares about how he looks and would stick any job interview.
A man that knows how to look good, but doesn't dwell on his looks. Hold yourself to a gentleman's standard of thinking, talking, and acting. When a man decides to become a gentleman, his looks will show it – inside and out.
Starting to upgrade your wardrobe and style but getting kind of hesitant?
Check out this article on 9 Reasons Why Your Looks Matter | Why Give A Damn About Appearance