“The Only True Freedom A Man Has Is To Make Up His Own Mind”
I heard this years ago – and agree.
Have the courage to go your own way.
It's hard, especially in a world where everyone is looking for the approval of others and social media focuses a spotlight on almost everything we do.
But if you try to please everyone…..you're going to be miserable, unhappy, and the ironic part is the very people you are trying to please won't even appreciate the efforts.
Because their busy with their own lives, and while you thought those likes on Facebook were important or taking the hour to prove your point to some random troll on the web……you missed out on living your own life.
Don't be a people-pleaser – live life on your own terms and have the courage to go your own way.
Well here are 5 tips to follow when feeling the pressure of trying to please everyone.
#1 Have a Clear Purpose – Stand For Something
Create a list of values that YOU resonate with.
There is no right or wrong way to go about this but here are some of my favorite formats you can consider using to create your philosophy:
- List Style – Creating a list of your philosophy in the form of a list is an ideal & efficient way to have it laid out. With a list, you can go back and reference at any time without extended reading. A great tool to share with your family as well.
- Check-list – If you prefer to refer to your list on a day-to-day basis, a checklist might be suitable for you. You can create your “philosophy to-do list” and check off values you have completed each day. Great to build up your motivation and ensure you are not being led astray.
- Manifesto – A cool approach is to create a short executive summary of your core values. Have some fun with it by making some words bold and adding colors. Something that's strictly yours will make you more likely to follow through.
Whichever approach you decide to take, there is no question you will begin to prioritize which people in your life is worth your attention and what you should limit.
Click Here For My Family's Value – Centeno Family Value LIST
#2 Make Small Daily Improvements
Men work best when they receive positive results on a consistent basis.
The downside to this is men can feel pretty demotivated when unable to reach their goals.
That's why it's critical that you set small, incremental goals for yourself. This will allow you to chip away at your major goals a little bit at a time.
There will come a day where you will not achieve your desired outcome. Looking at a span of a week and seeing you improved 6 out of the 7 days this week will confirm your consistency.
Consistent improvement breeds motivation and confidence.
#3 Be Positive Gentlemen
Sounds simple enough on paper but harder to do in theory.
Being positive can go a long way to ensure you reach your goals.
This becomes more important when you have a family to take care of.
Believe me, I know! 🙂
Being positive takes time but the benefits are worth it.
Here are two simple ways you can bring more positivity into your life:
- Look at the Bright Side – Take the glass half full mentality. Everyone has to deal with some bad in their life at some point. What makes the difference is when you can find something good about the situation or chalking it up as a learning experience.
- Cut Out Negativity – Negative comments and feedback can consume you if you allow it. The best way to deal with negative people or comments in your life is to simply ignore it.
#4 Don't Measure Yourself Against Others
Living in a big city can be interesting given we are social creatures.
Men have a tendency to compare themselves with others.
This is something to be very careful with as it's easy to build resentment and get yourself down.
In reality, there is only one real person you should compare yourself to.
Think about it. Self-improvement is one of the leading causes of confidence building and happiness. Why shouldn't you take some time to improve yourself everyday?
A great way to measure yourself is to always be just a little bit better when you go to bed each night from the previous day.
#5 You Have Control
This is good news.
Most of us like to complain about certain things. I'm guilty of this sometimes.
While venting is important it is key to know that there are many people in this world that have it worse than us.
In fact, most of us have more control over our lives than we realize with the ability to change the situation we find ourselves in.
Armed with this fact helps you take things into perspective.
If you are in a situation you are less than happy about, make every effort in your power to change it for the better.
You do have the ability to do this.
In conclusion – Having a concrete plan containing your core values and future goals will set you up for success.
Pleasing everyone will lead to burnout and unhappiness.
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